What Have I Become?

I’ve been dipping my fingers in the holy water of crafting a lot more lately. I think that’s mostly because I’ve already cooked everything on the planet, and now I need a new hobby.

I used to be very crafty, way back in the 1900’s, but kids and jobs and spouses kind of sucked all my time away. I’m almost not at all ashamed to admit that I am enjoying my born-again craftiness. Yesterday, I learned to sew. SEW, people.

I am very ashamed, however, to admit that I’ve waited almost 365 full days to review this book.

Paper Crafts Gourmet

Paper Crafts Gourmet (by Paper Craft Magazine) showed up on my doorstep about this time last year, and in the hubbub of Christmas with three kids, it got shelved. And then I couldn’t remember who sent it to me. (Still can’t.) This year, I’m trying to be a less sucktastic, and a little more artsy, and that’s where this book review comes in.

I love to cook, and I’m trying to be more creative, and here’s a cookbook with simple recipes AND the recipes for a craft to go with each one. Step by step instructions on how to make EVERYTHING…food, notecards, gift jars, whatever. It’s insane. And I’m almost not totally ashamed to admit that my little suburban heart skips a beat every time I flip through it.

There’s pretty much one recipe & craft for every season, including American Idol season, so there’s something to do all the time. Most of it seems easy enough that with some patience and the right tools, I could do these with my older boys.

American Idol

Some of it is admittedly a little more kitchy than I am capable of getting, but some of it has insanely useful application in my everyday, my-kid-has-7-teachers-and-it’s-Christmas-time life.  Some of it has practical application in my I’m-too-cool-to-carry-a-lunchbag-to-school-mawm life. And some of it makes my holiday-spirit-life kind of explode.

Lunch Box
Christmas Crafts Teacher Gift
{If you click them, they get bigger}

I love it. There, I said it. I love this damn book and everything it stands for that I swore I never would. I love it the way I love that minivan I’m trying to talk my husband into buying, the way I love the wire reindeer in my front lawn and my candy-cane walkway lights. I love it the way I love the cotton-ball Christmas trees I made with my kids last week.

Cotton Ball Christmas Trees

I love it the way I love this new person I was stolen and replaced with one night.

I am not taking my nose ring out, however. I’m not that done being an angsty 20-something just yet.

{Since I blow so much at getting reviews done on time, I’m going to try to buy my way out of this one by sending three of these out as Christmas gifts from me, to you. Leave a comment to enter, maybe tell me your most atrocious crafting fail? and we’ll draw three names next week.}



Filed under Holidays, Reviews

27 responses to “What Have I Become?

  1. Oh, what a book! I, too, am crafting (hey, we all need something to do during nap time, canIgetanAMEN!).

    In fact, as I type, I’m making a calender and Christmas cards.

    Plus, I love to cook, so this would be awesome!

  2. Pam

    My most spectacular crafting FAIL was a sweatshirt that you had to cut out Holly around the collar then line the cut area with a gluey substance that stops fraying.
    My sister told me after a year that it was so stiff it rubbed her neck raw!

    That’s love man.

  3. I made silver bead-studded Gene Simmons batwings from scratch (I actually ventured into Jo-ann Fabrics by myself!) 4 Halloweens ago for Fury’s costume. It wasn’t atrocious. I’m just taking advantage of this opportunity to brag.

  4. I tried to make Angel wings with tinfoil for my kid’s halloween costumes once.

    I thought I did a bang up job in making them look holy and angelic.

    Everyone else thought I did a bang up job making them look like little tin robots.

    Eh. Robot. Angel. It’s all the same isn’t it?

  5. Wow! Those are some neat trees.

    My greatest craft fail to date, was trying to sew covers for toaster, blender, and an apron. You had to put red stuff w/cotton around it. It’s some weird trim, a bias cording trim.

    I started in in thrid grade for a present for Christmas 1982, I am still not finished with it.

    Urrggg! It’s driving me crazy that I can’t remeber the name of that trim!

    Thanks, Mr. Lady, thanks for being the cause of my craziness, today. I’m always looking for someone to blame. Thanks for standing up and taking the bow today!

  6. Moving has been a really good thing for you…mini van, wire reindeer lawn ornaments, crafting….OH! And finding really cool stuff to review that’s been packed away! 😉

    My craft failures are plentiful, unlike a certain commenter *cough* BUSY DAD *cough*. But we know already that he’s perfect…

  7. --R

    I need something like this, that book sounds awesome. I’ve been trying to make a corkboard out of wine corks for almost a year now. But I keep failing miserably, ripping the corks off, and starting over. Fun times I tell you!!

  8. Lauren

    I want it!! Come on!! You know I NEEEEEEEEEED it!!! Don’t you owe me or something???

  9. I want that book just for the cookies on the cover!
    I am non-crafty. (Except for the toilet paper tube fireplace fire I made for my son a couple years ago, it was pretty awesome)
    However, sometimes I just need the proper motivation. Like a good book.
    Oh, and seriously all this crafty talk has me motivated. I’m going to the store today to buy some glitter, stop at a tree and get some pinecones, then make ornaments with my 3 yr old. Should be fun, messy, glittery, fun.

  10. Chris

    I’m terrible at sewing. In 8th grade I got a D in home ec class. Embarrassing!

  11. Okay, I’ve been thinking during this whole post about why I needed this book and here’s what I came up with: becoming crafty will obviously make up for every parenting mishap I’ve ever been a part of. Crafty=perfect mother, right? I’m just sticking to that idea, stocking up on cotton balls and gonna wait for that book to arrive in the mail. 🙂

  12. I’m very impressed with your new sewing knowledge. I’d have to say my biggest crafting fail has been anything that involves sewing. It’s the one thing I. CANNOT. DO. I will admit that even being near a sewing machine has been known to break it. More than once. But this book? It would solve all of my inadequacies.

  13. My most atrocious attempt at crafting? Easy! How about EVERY FREAKING THING I’VE TRIED! Yes, so bad in fact, that the sentence deserves to be in all caps. Because that right there? Is EXACTLY what my family says each and every time I say the “c” word, or “w” word, or anything with the phrase “I could make”.

    But, with the right tools, I’d be game.

  14. anya

    I made a Christmas plaque for every single one of my relatives for Christmas one year, and it is god awful, butt ugly. My parents still hang it every year. *shudder.

  15. I’m really good at sewing — not bragging, just saying this as juxtaposition for my utter crafting fail which was my attempt to knit myself a scarf in 1991. I found the skein of yard the other day with some needles still stuck into it. The 10″ of “finished” scarf, which varies in width by INCHES in and out, as if it were knitted to resemble the path of a drunken hobo late one night, was still attached. Apparently, I was not meant to be a knitter.

  16. i REFUSE to admit that i have failed at anything especially crafts…..i have simply had to “alter” the original plan! LOL seriously i have had so many things i had to “alter” it is crazy!!! 90% of the time it turns out better but took me 100 times as long to do!!!

    this would be an amazing book to have!!!

  17. I don’t usually fail at craft projects, but that’s mostly because I only do the grade school ones. If I attempted real grown up crafts I might have some war stories for you. I’m a chicken.

  18. Dawn

    My biggest fail was promising a friend a sewn kitty plastic bag holder, taking her shopping, cutting it out, sewing two seams and then shelving it. Where it still resides, four years later. Taunting me.

  19. Christine

    Most atrocious crafting failure was a puppy doll that I was trying to sew for my niece. Only the ears ended up to pointy, so I decided to turn it into a kitten doll, only the paws were to skinny so I decided that it would be a mouse doll… You can see where I’m going with this. The Puppy-kitten-mouse hybrid still sits in my sewing basket, glaring balefully at me waiting to be finished. LOL

  20. Lisa Shipp

    How about tonight for instance, tomorrow is my kid’s gingerbread contest at school and we waited until TONIGHT to start! Ya well, it was a complete disaster, collapsed twice and broke in three places! We didn’t give up! We just smeared more frosting on it and set it outside in the subzero temps to “flash” freeze it!! Wish us luck! LOL

  21. mn

    i like crafty stuff. i kinda wish i could do better!! so mostly i stick to being crafty in my emails, ha

  22. I like to pretend I’m crafty 🙂 But I’m really not as crafty as I pretend to be. I got a sewing machine last Christmas and decided I wanted to make a quilt…yea, it’s no where near done, but it is started. I got a knitting set the Christmas before and have yet to complete a project. But I love to bake! And I’m really good at that! I think my problem is I take on too big of projects, I should probably stick to the little stuff. Maybe your book would help me 🙂

  23. Amber

    My biggest crafting fair was the year I tried to encase a cooked turkey in hot wax to preserve it for our holiday decorations. Trust me, do NOT try that one at home!

  24. Christine

    I am terrible at crafts, but desperately want to be better. I can’t even carve a pumpkin. 😦

  25. Stephanie Knight

    I totally need this shit. I love being crafty, but do better when someone is telling me exactly how to do it…

  26. Lindsay

    I so badly want to be crafty. I so badly want to be artistic. I so badly want to be musical. I mess up EVERYTHING I cook. I am terrible at all all of the above. As a Pisces, aren’t those things supposed to be a GIVEN?!

  27. I love it. I’m totally not ashamed to admit that I have been breaking out my glue gun more and more.. I even made a wreath this year. That’s something I would have scoffed at a few years ago. I proudly sport my glue gun blisters and burns and my trash can has held more than it’s share of screwed up bows and paper crafts.. but, that’s half the fun! Right?

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